The truth is that you can be only as happy with another person as you can be with yourself. If you like who you are, being with another person can be an extension of your happiness, But, if you do not like yourself, being with someone else can only exacerbate your unhappiness.
Your decision to enter into partnership should not be based on a desire to avoid looking at yourself, but on a willingness to intensify that process. When you live with other people, you are likely to trigger their unhealed wounds and they are likely to trigger yours. Becoming aware of the unhealed parts of you is neither pleasant nor easy. However, it is a necessary part of the journey to psychic wholeness.
Relationship is like a giant backhoe. It digs down through the superficial layers of consciousness and exposes your deepest fears and insecurities. If you aren't willing to look this deeply, you might want to question your desire to be in an intimate relationship. You can't get close to another person without coming face to face with yourself.
Paul Ferrini
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